Rachel Ann B. Pedroso
I am one of the Penelope’s of this world. I disguised behind my exterior. People see me as a naive and primitive girl with nothing worthy between my head. I stood 5’4” tall with untidy cumbersome black hair. I have pimples spread over my round face in full sunny side up splendor with an odd birthmark at the right side. My nose is not exceptional, it’s flat and big and my sister is teasing me of its cave-like contour. My lips are full but it shivers in hunger, it pursed in anger and when I’m really fed up, it bleeds. Oh, then there’s my eyebrows that map a quarter of my face. My eyelashes can be very attractive, lush and long like a raven’s wing following a tear-less whimper. My eyes were round and deep and they nicely hid my insecurities. My skin a sartorial dichotomy: fair but very hairy.
You see, you think I’m ugly.
But have you seen enough to judge me? Take a closer look.
I am a princess. And I hate to camouflaged anymore. I stand as a dignified woman with sense and substance behind my words. I plan with certainty, work with confidence and walk with conviction. I worked hard everyday. I loved my muscle pains and sweat-smelling uniforms after doing my nursing care with propriety and professionalism. I believed I can do what I decently desire in life with the right attitude, determination and willpower. I have a strong faith in God and I welcome failures and disappointments in life because they are the best teachers. I love my pimples; they at least remind me to slow down and de-stress, to sleep at least six hours a day and eat a well-balanced meal. Pimples prompt me to visit the facial center and relax on the spa after a very excruciating facial treatment. But who cares about the torture on my face and the soreness thereafter? Beauty after all is coupled with pain. I used to envy the nose of Penelope Cruz with its perfect aquiline contour, but now I am satisfied with my imperfect nose that at least could smell right and protect me from the strains of Influenza and mers corona viruses.
I once looked at Madonna’s eyebrows with wonder. When I was 18, I went to a parlor to have my eyebrows plucked the way hers was impeccably shaped. I cried after almost half of the width of my eyebrows was pulled off. It was unbearable and I thought for a moment that I wasn’t breathing. When I looked at the mirror, (holy cow) I can’t believe it, but I looked great. So, from that day on, I embraced the changes that come with the passing of time. It is hard to let go of what we are used to and to leave memorable things behind. But isn’t it amazing to discover new things and feel both the fear and the thrill of that experience? Everyone has his own fears. We have to face those demons scaring us or else we will live in total darkness forever. To escape is cowardice but facing them head on will eventually set us free. Somewhere along the battlefield is a katana revealed only to the brave and bold of hearts.
Thorns will wound me and scar me for life. These are few of the ugly things that are meant to happen to strengthen my bearing and confidence. It will make me stronger, wiser and more beautiful in life.
Like you, like them, I am one of the Penelope’s in this world. But I have chosen to reveal who I really am. I have shown you my heart and have revealed my soul for you to see through me clearly. I am beautiful you see, pretty without a glittering scepter and crown.